‘Jack Frost:’ Help, My Dad is an Undead Snow Lich and Also Michael Keaton

Before we really get into just how deeply unsettling this movie is, let me clear something up first: If you’re like me, you have fond memories from your childhood of wandering through the aisles of some nondescript video rental store (or a Blockbuster, if, unlike me, you actually grew up in civilization) on a Friday night, browsing through each shelf row by row while your … Continue reading ‘Jack Frost:’ Help, My Dad is an Undead Snow Lich and Also Michael Keaton

Festive War Crimes with ‘The Santa Clause’

Okay, so right off the bat, using The Santa Clause as an example of why Christmas movies are inherently terrifying is cheating a little, because c’mon: Tim Allen, right? A Trump worshipping, coke-trafficking snitch whose bizarre growls and groans in the Home Improvement era of his career suggest either demonic possession or genuine mental illness. His hardcore conservative views clash constantly with his Disneyfied, Buzz … Continue reading Festive War Crimes with ‘The Santa Clause’

What a Way to Go: The Worst (Best?) Deaths in ‘Final Destination’

With a lot of horror films, plot is somewhat of an afterthought. This is particularly apparent in long-running franchises where the number of sequels and installments begins to outnumber the amount of braincells it took to write each respective script. Saw, Hostel, and Friday the 13th are all series in which is becomes increasingly clear over time that the stories for each film were being … Continue reading What a Way to Go: The Worst (Best?) Deaths in ‘Final Destination’

How Many References are in this One Frame of ‘Cabin in the Woods?’

Got a bit of a silly one for you guys today. Cabin in the Woods is one, I think, one of the most rewatchable horror movies ever made. Part of that is due to its fun, snappy, Joss Whedon sensibilities. The dialogue is clever and catchy, without being overly obnoxious or twee, and the plot is just complex enough to be intriguing without bogging the … Continue reading How Many References are in this One Frame of ‘Cabin in the Woods?’

The “Surprise Villain” Twist: A Rant

This summer, I’ve seen five massive blockbuster films, each with varying degrees of quality: Solo, Jurassic World: The Fallen Kingdom, Incredibles 2, Ant-Man and the Wasp, and Mission Impossible: Fallout. And while all five are action films, they could not be any more different in terms of story, with plot’s ranging from intergalactic crime syndicates to dinosaur islands to superhero family dramas (alright, fine, there’s … Continue reading The “Surprise Villain” Twist: A Rant